The Invisible Library

Is it really any surprise that Ron Paul’s favorite superhero is Batman? Every politician thinks of themselves as a crusading billionaire, out to save the world by any means necessary. But it’s especially telling that Paul, no big fan of consensual reality, would picture himself as Batman, the dark brooding, disturbed and obsessive Shadow in a world full of lunatics with crazy plots and half baked schemes. That he picked specifically Paul Pope’s Berlin Batman is even more telling, as the plot revolves around the papers of Libertarian grand dingbat, Ludvig von Mises. I seem to remember a Zeppelin in that issue as well.

How do the other candidates match up to comic book characters?

So, Mitt Romney gave a speech, did you hear? In it, he blathered on, as politicos are want to do, about the importance of religion, and our shared spiritual values and how, so long as we all believe in Jesus, at least a little, than Freedom! Cake! Puppies and kitties! Vote for Romney!

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In a recent post I characterized all the Republican candidates as evil, belligerent Jesus freaks. I realized that this is a wide category and surely has some nuance to it. So, I’ve decided to clarify as to exactly why all of these people would be not just bad presidents but are in fact loathsome human beings in general. Here is why I won’t be voting for…
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It’s Official.  There’s absolutely no one running for president who has my vote.  The Republicans are all evil, belligerent Jesus freaks. Hillary is way too Hawkish (and hasn’t met a principle she wouldn’t sell to the highest bidder for a handful of votes), Edwards can’t seem to say anything coherent and Obama becomes less appealing every damn time he opens his mouth. For a while, I had a slim hope in Kucinich, who aside form some silly, off the cuff remark about UFOs, was pretty damn sensible. But then he went and said that, if nominated, he’d pick Ron Paul as his running mate. While either him or Ron Paul winning the nomination is a slim peg to hang your hat on, I’m seriously disappointed that, out of over a dozen candidates, not one of them is sane, sensible or smart enough to not be a total fuckwit.

So, here we are, a year left until the election and I’m already sick of every single one of these circus freaks we have to choose from. Way to go, Democracy.

The latest stunt by Ron Paul’s cultish followers comes to us from Greg Saunders at The Talent Show (and This Modern World). In the form of a blimp:

What planet are these guys from? In 2007, do people descend into a state of reverent awe whenever they see a large gray cylinder flying in the sky? Call my a cynic, I really doubt that the entire nation would collectively pause with wonder to follow the journey of a rented blimp.

Come on Greg, this is fucking genius! It’s big, ponderously slow and full of hot air! It screams “I am so out of touch with reality that I can float around aimlessly propelled by my own hot air!”

Look, I have fond dreams of a New Zeppelin Age, just like any sci-fi geek. Flying around the world on a cruise ship in the clouds… But come on! In the real world, people have better things to do with their time than watch balloons drift slowly by.

This highlights how retrograde Ron Paul’s ideas really are. He and his supporters want to recreate the 1930’s, Zeppelins and all because that was the last time White Male Christians had unchallenged control of the political scene. After World War II,  it wasn’t cool anymore to be antisemitic. By the sixties, you couldn’t be racist and by the seventies, you couldn’t be sexist. But, if we turn the clock back to those good old days when zeppelins roamed the sky, well, anything goes, so long as you’re in possession of a Bible, an X chromosome and enough gold sway back a mule.

But the fun doesn’t end there, no sir. The ad on the Official Ron Paul Blimp site (because every bad idea needs its very own website) compares donating to the Ron Paul Blimp with the Boston Tea Party. That’s right, supporting Ron Paul is just like throwing your money into the harbor.

The modern day Conservative Movement has convinced millions of otherwise smart and sensible Americans that to help their neighbors and fellow citizens is an evil so profound as to be neigh on par with that age old bogeyman, Socialism. Children shouldn’t have health care, the President, a pro-family Christian, told us, because… well, he never really did say why. But he implied that if lower middle class children got used to having ready access to health care, then poor children and even adults would expect to have access to health care that borders on the Universal and well, we all know how bad that is. Just look at France! With their lower infant mortality rates, longer life expectancy and lower rates of obesity and chronic illness, plus all those doctors on call 24/7, why it’s a veritable Hell of Socialized Medicine! It’s a wonder that the French don’t flock across the ocean for our American style, sub par health care with it’s built in hidden fees, byzantine bureaucracy and outrageous prescription costs.

Meanwhile, Bush and his cronies in the Federal Reserve are debating how much money they’re going to use to bail out the banks who are floundering under a wave of defaulted mortgages. I mean, it’s not like they’re sick kids here, these are bankers! And they need our help!
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Over at Making Light, I’ve been taking part in a spirited discussion of the Ron Paul Phenomenon. It’s good to know I’m not the only person baffled by the popularity of this Libertarian Kook (and among otherwise liberal folk, too!) Seriously, do we need another religious nut from Texas with a hard on for an unrestrained Free Market in the White House? Just because he’s ostensibly against the Iraq War doesn’t make him sane. It just makes him the most lucid weirdo in the GOP.*

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China Mieville has a great article over at In These Times about Floating Utopias and the sinister, libertarian shadow, the tax-free micro-nation. It’s a fun read* but the best part is his summation of Libertarianism:

Libertarianism, by contrast, is a theory of those who find it hard to avoid their taxes, who are too small, incompetent or insufficiently connected to win Iraq-reconstruction contracts, or otherwise chow at the state trough. In its maundering about a mythical ideal-type capitalism, libertarianism betrays its fear of actually existing capitalism, at which it cannot quite succeed. It is a philosophy of capitalist inadequacy.

Libertarians have always struck me as either extremely naive or excessively callous. They don’t want to be part of society if they have to share burdens and responsibilities or contribute (other than goods and services that they get cash money paid for). They want to drop out of society and be like hippies, only they still want to drive Hummers and have that leather couch they’ve always wanted.

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Norman Spinrad, author of the classic proto-cyberpunk novel, Bug Jack Barron has a new book but you can only read the first third of it online. Apparently, no publisher wants to get behind Osama The Gun. The author explains that he fears it’s for political reasons and having read the first twenty pages or so, I can definitely see how that conclusion could be reached. it’s a great read though. Have a looksee. If enough people read part of it, maybe we can use these tired Internets for good and get this book the publication it deserves.

Via Warren Ellis.

Johann Hari boarded the National Review cruise to see what Neocons say when they think no one else is listening:

Some people go on singles cruises. Some go on ballroom dancing cruises. This is the “The Muslims Are Coming” cruise - drinks included. Because everyone thinks it. Everyone knows it. Everyone dreams it.

It’s like a cruise through an alternate reality, where Muslim Hoards are devouring Europe, the founding fathers fought a revolution to escape the tyranny of a king so they could establish a firm and resolute Executive President and we’re not only winning in Iraq but mystically redeeming our loss in Vietnam (due not to the Vietcong but to Liberal Commie appeasement, naturally) and everyone wets themselves in anticipation of bombs falling on Iran. Oh, and a black man thinks the KKK are just upset because they don’t have all the benefits that minorities have.

To my left, I find a middle-aged Floridian with a neat beard. To my right are two elderly New Yorkers who look and sound like late-era Dorothy Parkers, minus the alcohol poisoning. They live on Park Avenue, they explain in precise Northern tones. “You must live near the UN building,” the Floridian says to one of the New York ladies after the entree is served. Yes, she responds, shaking her head wearily. “They should suicide-bomb that place,” he says. They all chuckle gently. How did that happen? How do you go from sweet to suicide-bomb in six seconds?The conversation ebbs back to friendly chit-chat. So, you’re a European, one of the Park Avenue ladies says, before offering witty commentaries on the cities she’s visited. Her companion adds, “I went to Paris, and it was so lovely.” Her face darkens: “But then you think - it’s surrounded by Muslims.” The first lady nods: “They’re out there, and they’re coming.”

Link via at Boing Boing.